Why I Ate Your Garbage

My Triumphs and Trials as the Glendale Bear

Over the spring and summer months of 2012, the city of Glendale has had repeated visits from a mysterious black bear with a love of suburban ranch houses, frozen meatballs, and fresh garbage. He has been called “The Glendale Bear,” “Glen Bearian,” “Meatball,” and “The Next Mayor of Glendale.” Until today, we’ve heard from him only in 140-character tweets, but now, for the first time, Glen Bearian takes to the pages of a major publication to bear all.

Call me Meatball. Some years ago–never mind how long precisely–having little or no …