California, Where Whatever You Do, You Will Be Wrong

We’re All in This Together—But Please, Keep Your Distance

Our politics may be paranoid, our society may be paralyzed, our police may be irredeemable, and our skies may be on fire, but don’t fear! At least we Californians can see clearly how to navigate all our crises.

We Californians are fortunate that we receive so much guidance, official and unofficial, about how to respond to these emergencies. All we have to do is follow it. Which is easy-peasy, if you are broad-minded (and we do have a reputation for being broad-minded).

For starters, go outside. You must avoid the indoors, because …