California to Lindsay Lohan: Sorry!

Even LiLo Couldn't Behave This Badly

Dear Lindsay Lohan,

I owe you an apology. Not for prosecuting you for allegedly taking a $2,500 necklace that wasn’t yours – I know, I know, you think the entire universe is a swag display case – or for those previous drunk-driving arrests. I hope there are no hard feelings; I gotta do what I gotta do, though I do appreciate your showing up for your day in court in that white dress last week. Wow.

What I must apologize for is the fact that you’re being compared to me these days. …