Did you ever play at non-existence?
My brother and I taught ourselves to play the game
no one else would’ve shown two kids:
how to lean forward under the counter,
under our mother’s billowing apron
and imagine a darker shadow,
a more complete darkness rising
before and after the small spheres of light
we knew our lives were. And then, with a little effort,
I could, for a single breath,
almost taste it, what it would mean
to not be anywhere, to never have been.
Darkness filled the space
and left its pale fingerprint on my heart.